It's bean-throwing time in Japan. It's a ritual that I believe is supposed to symbolize getting rid of evil spirits, and making room for good ones. I will never forget one friend wondering what would happen if a person threw a CAN of beans out a window...Anyway, I have no beans to throw. I have hardly any groceries to throw at anything, because I caught a super bug that really knocked the stuffing out of me for the past 2 weeks. I haven't felt like doing much of anything beyond work. And work has been a kicker. Deadline after deadline has come and gone. And as usual, I scrambled (plan ahead, you say??? HAhahahha) to meet those barreling deadlines. Whew. This a January I'm glad is behind me. I won't list the details but I had some major event/thing every week. Consequently I am tired. I'm still coughing, but thankfully each cough now does what it's supposed to do and doesn't hurt any more. At least there's THAT. I am grateful for the little things these days. Like the groceries my in-laws brought over when I sent out an S.O.S last weekend. And the mandarin oranges that mystically, magically appeared on my kitchen table today. I am grateful for the talented kids I get to work with every day. But again, I am tired.
Here's a little something my friend Madeleine Bialke wrote. She is 18 years old and a Freshman in College. I thought this was a good piece. I think her Mum and Dad did a great job.
Here is her piece:
To the average, middle class-to-upper class people of second or first world countries who are down on life:
We often get caught up in the rigors of our own lives, and the little things that happen each day that get us down. Too many papers due, coffee spilled in the car, a messy breakup, even a paper cut. It’s easy to get into the rut of complaining about every misfortune that comes your way, and commiserating with your friends as a sort of bonding experience. Why not? You’re harrowed; you’re run down, tired, you haven’t slept well for months, nothing goes as planned, your best intentions go awry, you lost your job, you broke it off with the love of your life, you lack inspiration, your computer broke, your dog died, your child doesn’t respect you, you broke your leg, you suffer from insecurity and self esteem issues, you can’t get out of the closet, you’re failing out of college, you’re getting fat, your car was totaled by a driving maniac, a kid in your English class is stalking you, you have an eating disorder, your spouse left you for some younger tail, you have alcohol problems, you’re in jail, you have a bad credit rating, and you’re in love with your best friend.
There is nothing laughable about these concerns. These are real life problems, and have to be taken seriously. We all feel sorry for you, we really do, and we wish that your problems could go away, and you could be happy. We understand that you go through a lot, and we support you.
I have a solution for you. It won’t fix your problems, but perhaps it will help your mental state of mind, and your general outlook on life. This solution is called the “At Least Principle”.
Though you have traumatic experiences in life, and you aren’t happy with the way things currently are, at least you have a roof over your head, a decent income, and food on your table. You have friends and family, you can buy just about anything you want, you have a room to yourself, you don’t have to share a bathroom, you have running water—CLEAN running water, you can bathe every day, you can drive to your job and it’s not even that far away, you have free wireless at Starbucks, you can listen to any song in the history of the music industry, the world is at your fingertips, you have delicious food, you can vote, you can take nature walks, and you can be whoever you want to be.
At least you don’t live in a mud hut next to an open latrine.
At least you weren’t a Jew in the holocaust.
At least you didn’t die of cholera on the Oregon Trail.
At least you didn’t have to flee the killing fields of Cambodia.
At least a Pharaoh didn’t kill your firstborn son.
At least you never had to live through the Genocide in Rwanda.
At least you didn’t lose your family to an earthquake, hurricane, tsunami or volcano eruption.
At least you didn’t drown, trapped in the third class rooms of the Titanic.
At least your family didn’t sell you as a slave so they could buy food.
At least you didn’t cross the Atlantic in a slave ship.
At least you didn’t die in the crossfire’s of a world war.
At least you’re not dying of starvation in a third world country.
At least you have the luxury of complaining about concerns other than the ones listed previously. You are lucky enough to be in the upper echelon of human society, and don’t you take it for granted.
You aren’t blessed with such things, because that would mean that you deserve this and all the others don’t. We live in a world that is fraught with inequality, injustice, and apathy towards other people. You deserve your life as much as everyone else does, and no being or higher power ‘chose’ this for you. You are just REALLY DARN LUCKY.
So whenever you’re feeling depressed with your life, just remember the “At Least Principle”; it’s a good way to put your life in perspective, and really cherish the things that you do have. Remember that old saying about the glass being half empty or full? Well, it’s pretty full. You have a wonderful life. It has its ups and downs, but all in all, it’s pretty amazing. At least you’re lucky, and don’t you forget it.
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